Custody Battle with my Ex After Separation.

Question

Me and my ex got a dog 3 years ago after we lost a child. It was the family dogs, but we separated 2 years ago. The original agreement was that Monday through Friday she would drop her off before work and pick her up after. Because I was down and out after the break financially… I don’t have a home to sleep in at night, but I don’t have her at night though. We just hang out during the day. Until last month when I kind of threatened her because she threw all the personal material possessions my grandmother given away to me. I said the last memory I have of my grandma was Nala making my grandma laugh. So, I’m keeping that memory and Nala for good and safe so she can’t take it away. And since then, she has withheld me from seeing her. I go to her mother's house and try to see her. They hold the dog back, shush her from barking, etc.… Can I call the cops and be in the right and still get to see my best friend if I am financially unstable and what not? Because there is no lack of love, and she eats well every time she is with me. I take credit for her obedience given that she will listen to me over any of the family member. I’m not asking for full custody because I understand she is the family dog, but she is my best friend. Please help.

Answer

Ideally when people share an animal and split, there would be a written agreement on custody/visitation. When this does not happen and the parties cannot agree on custody/visitation, the person not in possession often has the burden to commence a civil lawsuit. Some disputing parties agree to mediation instead of litigation (at least as a first step) to try to work out a fair agreement. The police can also be contacted, although the police do not usually intervene in animal custody disputes. It can be helpful for people to have on hand proof of “parenthood,” such as microchip registration, dog license, veterinary records, and adoption/purchase agreement. Courts might also consider who has been an animal’s primary caretaker and who has paid for the animal’s needs.

Animal custody laws have passed in a few states, including California. While these laws are applicable to divorce and legal separation proceedings, some courts have considered the well-being of animals in non-marital animal custody cases too. California’s law states, in part: “…the court, at the request of a party to proceedings for dissolution of marriage or for legal separation of the parties, may assign sole or joint ownership of a pet animal taking into consideration the care of the pet animal.” The law defines “care” to include such things as “the provision of food, water, veterinary care, and safe and protected shelter.”